Dr. Meg-John Barker
There's actually a vast diversity of things people can enjoy erotically – alone or with others – and all of this is equally 'proper' as long as it's done consensually.
Meg-John helped produce ‘Monogamy, Non-Monogamy, etc.’ and ‘Nurturing Desire’. Listen on the Ferly App.
Dr. Meg-John Barker is a writer whose works include self-help books and accessible comics and zines about sex, gender, relationships, and mental health. They’re also the co-creator of sex and relationship podcast Meg-John and Justin.
They’ve been a psychologist for more than a quarter of a century – studying, researching and teaching in this space. They’ve also got a decade's experience working with clients as a psychotherapist specialising in sex, gender and relationships, and they aren’t planning on stopping any time soon!
What are your main areas of Expertise?
I've done a lot of work on monogamous and non-monogamous relationships, kink and BDSM, bisexuality and queer, trans and non-binary gender, asexuality, consent, self-care, and Buddhist mindfulness. I focus on how the cultural messages we received about sex, gender, relationships, and ourselves mess us up and what we can do about it.
Who does your work impact?
I'm a writing mentor helping other writers in this area find their voice and get their work out there. I also train practitioners and other groups on these topics, speak on panels, run workshops, and advise people creating media.
Why do you do what you do?
I think that most of the advice we receive about sex and relationships is poor, sometimes even damaging. I feel passionate about getting other materials out there which put the emphasis on the systems and structures around us needing to change, rather than continuing to make us feel bad about ourselves.
What are you most proud of?
I'm most proud of my books Rewriting the Rules, Enjoy Sex (How, When and IF You Want To), Queer: A Graphic History, Life Isn't Binary, and Gender: A Graphic Guide. Many many more to come!
What is one sex myth you'd like to bust?
The myth that one kind of sex is 'proper' sex. There's actually a vast diversity of things people can enjoy erotically, alone or with others, and all of this is equally 'proper' as long as it's done consensually.
Why do you think sexual wellness is having a moment and why is sexual wellness important to you?
I think people are realising that so many of the messages we've received about sex have encouraged us to have mediocre, unwanted, even non-consensual sex. We need a completely different set of messages that help us tune into what lights us up, be able to communicate that to others, and let it enrich our whole lives.
You can find Meg-John Barker at …
Twitter: @megjohnbarker, @megjohnandjustin
Email: megjohnandjustin.com